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INJEWCON
Election Roundup
•
Bush's Case for Crusade
• GOP Graffiti Attack
• "I Am Not a
Waiter"
• Lizard Caucus
• The
"Daddy Debates"
Bush
Makes Crusade Case to IJC Election Council
Hopes "Christ Killer Types" Will Stand Behind Him
An International Jewish Conspiracy Behind-the-Scenes Exclusive
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Goyopresident
George Bush met earlier this week with senior IJC members to
address concerns that his plans for a "Big-ass Crusade"
would spill over into an anti-Semitic progrom "like it
always does." The meeting at the 92nd Street Y was held
under the tightest security in the |
room labelled “Intermediate Jewellery Making - Mrs. Markowitz”
and members were allowed entrance only after a series of complex passwords
and security checks had been passed. The tight security was deemed
necessary because some (names withheld) members had threatened to
smack Goyopresident Bush, stating, “We are just so sick of his
shit.” more>
GOP
Conference Space Suffers Graffiti Attack
Giant Terrorist Hand Sought, Writing Banned
An International Jewish Conspiracy Behind-the-Scenes
Exclusive
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George W. Bush, the goy
President of the United States, held a great feast for a thousand
of his most important political allies, and drank wine in front
of the thousand. Mr. Bush, when he tasted the wine, commanded
that vessels of gold and of silver, which George Herbert Walker
Bush |
had skimmed off social security, be brought, that Mr. Bush and his
Republican allies might drink from them. They drank wine, and praised
the gods of gold and silver, bronze, iron, wood, and crude oil. more>
"I'm
Not a Waiter - I'm Secretary of State"
Candidate James Hart Requests Clarification
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GOP candidate
James
Hart has requested that black party members be made to wear
special “I’m Not A Waiter” T-shirts while
attending the Convention in New York. He told organizers he
was tired of his fellow Republicans “getting all uppity”
when asked to serve him liquor or hand him towels in the men’s
room. The request comes after a recent altercation witha delegate
from |
Chicago. “I just said, ‘Boy, ain’t you gonna hand
me that there towel, or do I has to teach you some manners?’
Wasn’t like I weren’t polite. But now he’s all pansy-ass
sensitive about it.” more>
Interdimensional
Lizard Caucus Showing Cracks?
Shape-shifting Aliens Call For Change
An International Jewish Conspiracy Weird Exclusive
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The Interdimensional Lizard
Caucus may be split for the first time in its 3,000-year
history of Earth habitation. Traditionally the various species
of travelers have left their differences behind at election
times and simply come out strongly for the most oppressive party
running, cementing their |
bond with the Republican Party during the Goldwater candidacy. This
(Earth) year, however, things may be different. more>
“Daddy
Debate” Cancelled
Mel Gibson's father will not be allowed
to contact the spirit of Arnold Schwarzenegger's father for a special
debate during a prime-time convention slot
The International Jewish Conspiracy has put the kibosh on Republican
convention organizers’ plans to have Mel Gibson’s father,
Hutton,
who denies that the Holocaust ever occurred, use the services of
a Psychic Friend medium to debate Gustav
Schwarzenegger, who helped make it happen.
read
the whole article>
Do you have a story about the Republican National Convention? Send
it to submissions@internationaljewishconspiracy.com.
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Moon
Crowned King
Gentiles do silly things, but goyish Senators always look extra
stupid when hanging with Special Agent "Reverend" Moon.
more>
Kabbalah
For Members
"No Hebe Left Behind"™
brings you part three of an InJewCon Educational Series.
more>
Are
You a Giant Lizard?
Conspiracy theorists have claimed that most members of the Illuminati
are, in fact, giant shape-shifting lizards. The International Jewish
Conspiracy's Medical Corps investigates.
more>
T&A
Campaign "Still a Success"
The policy of using naked females to distract viewers’ attention
from INJEWCON’s growing media stranglehold has been deemed
a success worthy of extension. Committee members celebrated with
a screening of Porky’s.
more>
Affirmative
Action May Go
Long-term plan to dilute Gentile bourgeoisie in peril.
more>
INJEWCON
to Allow Arnie Campaign
Can run despite “unnerving” accent.
more>
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