Princess Corps Members Demand Holiday Consolidation
Want One "Really, Really" Big Gift

Militant members of the Princess Corps have demanded that Chanukah giving be consolidated into a single gift which a heavily guarded spokesprincess called, "Really, really big. Like, kidney stone big, you know what I mean?" As an example she suggested, "Like a boat or something? Or a year off in Europe with a platinum card?"

Threats of mass pouting met with no immediate reactions, but sources close to the Elders of Zion, speaking on condition of anonymity, told reporters, "The Es of Z are really considering this. While we don't usually give in to strong-arm tactics, you have to remember how important these girls - sorry, young women - are to the movement. Also how powerful - these are the ladies who put the 'Cha' in Chanukah, and their ability to land goyish yuppies, then hold them in a vice-like grip, is vital to our plans."

IJC Chanukah Special!
Not only is Chanukah a time to share with your loved ones and to remember the Miracle it commemorates, it is also a time to confound Goyim, and to reflect on what that means in these hectic and difficult times.
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