INJEWCON
to Allow Arnie Campaign
Can run despite “unnerving”
accent
The International Jewish Conspiracy will allow buff Austrian-born
actor Arnold Schwarzenegger to run for Governor of California, despite
an accent which “makes us nervous” and a name with an
excessive number of consonants, according to a source at FILMJEWCON,
the International Jewish Conspiracy’s Hollywood affiliate.
Assistant Elders in the Politics Department admitted that they
may have hurt the actor’s campaign somewhat by waiting so
long to announce his candidacy but maintain that the damage was
minimal and could be “easily contained, unlike Germany.”
“There was a lot of haggling before we were prepared to let
him run.” Schwarzenegger brought a lot to the table, however,
and made a very persuasive argument for his candidacy. “Junior
2, Kindergarten Cop 2, Eraser 2. He even brought up Red Sonja, ich
bin ihm moichel. What else could we do? He runs or he acts. We made
the sane choice.”
They are also confident that the campaign will not be hurt by the
critical reception of “Terminator 3”, an expensive production
in which the gubernatorial hopeful plays a monosyllabic robot assassin
with contractual obligations. |

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This
Month in History: Awake to a Nation of Sleepy Gentiles!
From the Global Hebrew Scheme’s Quarterly Announcements
Pamphlet and Coupon Club Flyer, 1910.
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